The Peak Performance Expert

Yeah, yeah, I know…you’ve been meaning to get that whatever done for 3 months now but something always gets in the way. 

Let’s be honest.  That “something” is you. 

After working with countless clients who are self described procrastinators, I have come to see procrastination as an anxiety problem.

In many case, it’s the drive for perfection and fear of failure that creates a nasty performance = anxiety cycle. 

A typical scenario goes like this: Client starts to work on a project.  Internal dialog gets cranked up - “I really don’t know enough about this. They’ll think I’m stupid. I’ll never be as a good as X. I don’t know where to begin.” And on it goes. 

Of course such thinking either incites or exacerbates anxiety and when Client is anxious Client seeks to reduce anxiety. Working increases anxiety and not working reduces it. But Client is clever at disguising “not-working” by engaging in research which means searching the internet for more information which leads to discovering fascinating places to visit which leads to checking out cheap flights and boutique hotels which leads to an exchange of emails with friends about potential travel plans.  And before you know it, 2 hours have gone by and although Client now has a dream vacation arranged, the Project is still not done. 

So how does Client get a grip and get it done?  

First step - recognize the work = anxiety relationship and then admit that Client engages in procrastination (or research) in order to reduce the anxiety. 

Second step - identify and challenge the negative thinking that contributes to the anxiety. This ain’t easy but it is doable!  Client keeps track of negative thinking to get attuned to nasty internal dialog.  Client then evaluates and confronts cognitive distortions and changes them to be more realistic and objective.  Likely, this alone will help calm Client. 

Third step - change the negative association Client has with working on the Project. Client uses pleasant self-calming technique and breathing exercise to move into a nice, positive state of inner calm and then, and only then, Client begins to work on task at hand. 

As soon as calm disappears, Client stops and employs relaxation technique again. Each time Client feels anxious or uncomfortable or was tempted to blog or surf the net, Client takes a deep breath and go back into the relaxation stance.  

In other words, the Client is  being taught to retrain  mind and body to associate a pleasant feeling with work.  Prior to this, Client had inadvertently trained him/herself to associate work with unpleasant feelings which was then avoided by “procrastinating.”  

Clients always object to this recommendation saying they will never get anything done if they have to stop work when they get anxious but then they realize that they weren’t getting anything done anyway!

Client agrees to try and eventually is able to transform work style to an effective, productive one. The work = pain/anxiety relationship has been disrupted.

Yes, if you work in a cubicle this may be challenging.

As major-league baseball moves relentlessly towards playoff season, we all have the opportunity to see which team can survive the pressure.  The ability to stay poised and self-assured, even in high stakes situations is a valuable quality.  How well do you perform in high pressure, competitive situations?

The first step in improving your composure is self-awareness.  So you can ask yourself, when have you lost your composure?  What happened?  And also, when are you the most composed?

One way to ensure composure in high stakes situations is to be adequately prepared for those events.  Mental preparation is truly the key to success.  In preparing for a big talk or an important meeting, you might focus exclusively on the content and the organization of what you’re going to say and neglect the mental preparation.  This is a big mistake.

In oder to maintain composure, it’s useful to know how to control your body and control your thinking.  In today’s blog I’ll talk a bit about steps you can take to control your body’s response to stressful situations.

When we perceive something as threatening our body responds in particular ways.  Typically, your heart rate increases, your respiratory rate increases, and your muscles tense up as you prepare to run or fight.  This is fine if you are in fact going to run or fight.  However, usually, these responses undermine your performance. 

A quick way to reduce the negative impact of this is to focus on your breathing.  As I’ve mentioned in a previous post, don’t try to take a big deep breath, if you are in a stressful situation and you’re already tense, it can be very difficult to take in a nice deep breath.  You’re much better off focusing on your out-breath.  So exhale as slowly as you can, and notice how you begin to relax.  Now you can train your body and your mind to respond in any way you wish.  So why not train your body and mind to respond in a way that allows you to perform at an optimal level even in those high stakes situations.

Here’s one technique that I teach, and it’s called the Self Calming technique:

Find a quiet spot, sit upright,  and close your eyes.  Just notice the rise and fall of your breath for a moments.  And now exhale slowly, as slowly as you can, three times.  You might say to yourself, “With each out-breath I’m relaxing more and more.  As you relax, put your hand on your chest and notice the warmth from your hand spreading over your chest soothing you and calming you.  Continue to focus on your out-breath, telling yourself with each out-breath you’re relaxing more and more.  Be aware of the warmth from your hand as it contributes to your relaxation.  And you can say to yourself that in the future, whenever you’re in a stressful situation, all you have to do is exhale slowly three times, and put your hand on your chest in order to reconnect with these positive feelings of calm and relaxation.

If you practice this technique several times, it can be helpful to you in the heat of the moment.  So in a high-stakes performance situation, you can simply exhale slowly three times or even once and surreptitiously put your hand on your chest to reconnect to these positive feelings of calm and relaxation.

So this is just one example of a technique that you can incorporate in preparing for a high pressure, high stakes situation.

How often have you been told to “relax and take a deep breath” when you are stressed or anxious?  And have you tried it?  It ain’t easy.  And that’s because  when we are anxious, we’re breathing shallowly and quickly so trying to take a deep in-breath at that moment can feel almost painful and not at all relaxing.

Instead, focus on your exhale.  Breathe out as slowly as possible 3 times and see how that feels.  Notice yuor shoulders moving down from your ear lobes to their natural position. Notice that after you exhale slowly you are creating room in your lungs so you can take in a deep breath.  Isn’t that better?

Next time you watch a baseball game, notice what the pitcher does.  Does he stop to inhale deeply? No, he exhales profoundly.  This serves two purposes: it allows him to rid himself of excess tension and it allows him to take in a nice deep in-breath.  Aaah…now he can focus on the task at hand.  And you can, too!

So, if you’re feeling tense, simply exhale slowly 3 times…more if you have the time and the inclination.  Over time, you will train your mind and your body to relax and focus whenever you exhale s-l-o-w-l-y.